Mark's Random Thoughts

I figured that if people can suffer from phobias such as agoraphobia then perhaps the equivalent appears on the internet.
Thus, I bring you the new term E-agoraphobia ;o)

E-agoraphobia:

The irrational fear of crowded internet chat rooms, trolled forum threads or over populated mailing lists. This phobia can also manifest as a fear and then avoidance of any of the more popular mmorpgs…

Legolas207: Hey, what happened to Gandalf__X?
Frodddddo: Caught a case of E-agoraphobia from what I heard.
Legolas207: Ah, that would explain it. Hope he gets cured soon…

Ok, I was being a bit silly there.

My aunt Marion passed on some while ago, quite a long while as it goes. Medical science were not very swift doing their harvesting. God bless her and accept her into Heaven for that charitable offering and all the other kindnesses she achieved.

Her funeral is on Thursday and I was due to be there. I declined last night though as I’d be taking the wrong emotions with me…

Agoraphobia is somewhat defined as “An abnormal and persistent fear of public places or open areas, especially those from which escape could be difficult…” (from medterms.com). This does not truly explain my anxieties or indeed the situations that make the problem escalate, reduce or disappear entirely. I have absolutely nothing against open areas, or even empty public places, only the weakness inherent in much of humanity flares the issue. I feel sorry for those not strong enough to fight the compulsion to voice their interpreted reflection of my mind (I might explain that one day). I hold greater respect for those who understand the choices and then choose the person rather than any of the future possibilities.

Last Thursday I experienced an overheard discussion (Once again I might explain later) and the touch of a spectral hand as something hugged me. I reached to hold the hand (the arm actually) and felt disappointment that there was no solidity there, felt disappointment that I passed straight through. I did not truly try to touch using any potential spectral side of myself, did not try to touch just with thought, perhaps next time.

Anyway, since then there has not been much enjoyable to lift my mood and thusly minor things have been annoying me more than normal. This elevates the agoraphobia and then I take options to avoid crowds until some calm has returned.

Not a good mindset to take to a funeral huh.
I could go there after some drink (to relax the mindset and make the crowds easier to deal with) except I would feel guilty.

No funeral for me then.

I have over the course of my time on the internet used a number of IM clients (Instant Messenger). Indeed I have used several aliases on some, mostly through forgetting login details and just making new accounts. There are some IM systems that I just do not like… No prizes for guessing which.

I have tried pidgin before to group several clients, actually liked most of what it managed except for its skype support (skype had to be running, which rather defeats the object).

Browsing around I encountered Digsby which has a nice set of IM clients supported. It also integrates to social networks and email protocols.
I admit I was a little dubious about how well it would support so many different aspects of online social interaction. I figured it would be clunky and not have many adjustable settings.

I was pleasantly surprised once I had it running.
I now have it handling GoogleTalk, MSN (which I uninstalled years back), Yahoo (also uninstalled), Facebook Chat (there is the option to have it handle many other aspects of Facebook too) and a few email accounts that I rarely check.
I would recommend it

I even added a Digsby Chat widget to the left side of this site to show my support.

Called the motor repairers this morning to let them know the alarm guys would be visiting to fix the step and door sensor.
They did mention that they have started on the repairs.

Makes me a little happier to know that I will be off to foreign shores soon.

So, the replaced generator arrived early this morning. Picked up some fuel while taking the dog for a walk and, after some arduous pulls on the starter cord, managed to get the engine running. Will do some testing of the output once the motor is back to hook things up to.

Rather late this afternoon (or early evening dependent upon your perspective) the inverter arrived too…

Now need to get the motor back so I can fit these bits and pieces.

I did someone a favour some weeks back and installed the yahoo im client. Registered a yahoo account using one of my teckis email accounts and… spam blooming central.

This has made me realise that I should set up a new primary email address for when I head off travelling. I don’t want to be downloading worthless spam through a 3g connection throughout Europe really. None too sure on the prefix I might use yet, likely something obscure though

Will be time to drop back to just google talk and skype too, no point keeping apps that are only respected for video support if no-one offers that.

Even though the motor is now over at a repairers awaiting a damage assessor I put through another online purchase for the last needed item.
A battery monitor (with shunt) and intelligent relay controlled charging management unit. I figure with the alternator switching between the engine battery and leisure battery bank that the generator will not be needed quite as much.

So, now awaiting the new generator, the new parts and the vehicle back so I can fit those items.

With the generator and inverter both ordered, I did have hopeful plans to be leaving in a couple of weeks.

Then went and drove into a fence…

Now waiting on the insurance claim to get the damage fixed. Still staying optimistic though, hopefully will not take much time to be done. Still need a usable shunt charge meter and some basic fitting of some components anyway.

Am off for a meeting tonight. Touch base with my old boss